Have you noticed how quiet it’s gotten around here? You can tell it’s paddling season, can’t you? Well, if you’re looking for The Sisters this weekend you’ll find them on the river testing their mettle against 63 miles of Muddy Missouri in the Freedom Race.
I’ll be cheering them on from afar while cleaning house and eagerly awaiting the arrival of the Blistered Mom and Melloniece on Wednesday.
You can do it, cheers the Bard
Last to be is not your thing
Left then right, not in a ring
Saturday will be your day
You’ve 63 miles to go astray
So hurry Sisters, paddle up
Stroke and stroke, pee in a cup
Ok, ok all pokes aside
Wish that I were there to ride
along and tweet and sing and make
you laugh and cry and scream
Our core is strong, this won’t be hard
And should we lag, we’ll toast the lard
We left in the gym and on the plate
And all the times we didn’t wait
To go – and do – and stretch ourselves,
To brag and hope and heave a glass
To heave our glass: To Abs and Ass
We want to say if those are ours
They’re ample payback for the pain
And all the hours, that loss our gain.
Now watch us act all innocent
Polishing mirrors – flexed and bent
We shake our heads and say abs, where?
But honey, honey we saw you stare.
So come to the river you’ll see what I mean
The Blistered Sisters blast downstream
While all the others moan and cry
Chicks paddledaddle right on by…